Reconnecting to our Basic Human Dignity
We’re all familiar with the trope of a good angel on one shoulder and a bad angel on the other. This seems grandly narcissistic, as though each of us is caught in a cosmic struggle between ultimate good and ultimate evil. Many of us live under the influence of such external beliefs, and though we may not adhere literally to this idea, we are nonetheless inwardly pressured by the clash between goodness and evil.
False binaries dominate our consciousness, good versus evil, left versus right, wonderful versus horrible. We live squeezed between these exaggerations. The Buddha taught that the truth lies not in extremes but in the “middle way.” This teaching urges us to be present in our lives and act rightly in the moment. Similarly, the 12-step traditions speak of “doing the next right thing.” According to the Buddha, the next right step depends on the specific circumstances of the moment. Instead of fabricating extremes, the middle way turns our attention to what’s really happening.
Unfortunately, our brains are not attuned to the middle, especially when we are emotionally triggered. When we feel threatened we are able to easily grab extremes like little kids pounding their fists on the bed. “I hate you! I hate you!” As a child, we don’t really mean that and the universe cuts us slack. But in our adult life, we provoke consequences when we act. Where is our fist pounding leading? We can recognize the middle way when we question extreme beliefs. If we think, “This is horrible!” we should ask: Is that entirely true? Is there nuance? By examining what’s actually happening, we can orient ourselves toward a larger view of where our life is heading. The next right step becomes clear when we have a sense of direction. If our ultimate goal is to be compassionate, open, and helpful, we might ask does this step lead me toward or away from that view? This approach creates a more practical binary. Which action leads me to where I really want to go?
Where are we heading?
The Buddhist path always returns to the present. The next step is just one step, yet it leads toward the larger trajectory of our life. Where are we heading? By freeing the concept of karma from societal binaries, we see it more accurately as action. Karma is the dynamic interplay of energy. Much of the energy relating to us is shaped by our actions. Karma is vast and multifaceted, yet the middle way simplifies this: What are my actions creating right now, and where are they leading me?
Buddhist teachings encourage us to cultivate a broad, meaningful vision of our lives while connecting to the small, actionable steps within our reach. Material possessions, though significant to society, can be seen as means to an end, not the ultimate goal. Many people claim to be motivated by money but are often paralyzed by fear of it, doing little to address their concerns. In contrast, spiritual fulfillment, which I believe is the union of emotional growth, physical wellness, and mental clarity, motivates us deeply. These qualities thrive when we orient toward benefiting others and the world around us.
The Three Motivations
Buddhist teachings describe three motivations for walking the path:
- Self-Care: The foundational motivation is to care for oneself. We might meditate, exercise, or connect with others to feel better. While essential, this focus is limited; if feeling better is the only goal, we may falter when life doesn’t cooperate. Instead, self-care should build strength and resilience to navigate challenges. This step lays the groundwork for deeper growth.
- Realization: The second motivation is to seek greater understanding. In the 12-step tradition, people often say, “I came for the drinking, but I stayed for the thinking.” This captures the idea that addressing immediate problems leads to self-discovery. The journey progresses from acknowledging weaknesses to cultivating meditation, spiritual connection, and eventually helping others. This motivation deepens our commitment to transformation.
- Benefit to Others: The third motivation involves being of service to the world. This doesn’t mean proselytizing or seeking recognition. Instead, we embody our growth and offer it through our actions. With a clear vision and ample space for motivation, we can focus on the present moment and discern what needs to be done.
WALKING PAST RESTRICTIONS
Rather than clinging to oversimplified notions of good and bad, we can ask: Does this next step bring me closer to happiness, fulfillment, and the ability to contribute to my world? On one shoulder, we might have the voice of motivation, encouraging us forward. On the other, a doubtful voice may say, “You’re not ready,” or “The world isn’t deserving of your efforts.” This voice, born of past pain and fear, resists liberation because liberation challenges the familiar and the comfortable. But, many of have grown weary of treading the same circular path, and we become – or are sometimes forced to become – ready to drop the load and move more freely.
The second motivation—the pursuit of realization—helps us overcome fear. Its scary to change. Its painful to live. And moving forward on the path isn’t always easy or enjoyable, but once we get a glimpse of realization, it is the only direction to take. By aligning ourselves with the goal of liberation, we shed the binaries and constraints that hold us back. Liberation isn’t a grand ascension but a practical return to our natural state—our true selves.
Ultimately, walking the warrior path means shedding what no longer serves us and embracing openness and presence whenever it feels safe. It’s about reconnecting with who we truly are and living in alignment with our highest potential.
